- Kicking things off with a sobering metaphor for our political landscape in 2015, a Democratic candidate in Mississippi won a seat in the state house of representatives this past week by performing what feat in order to break an electoral tie?
- Continuing our theme of end of the world shenanigans, what is the first genetically modified food animal approved for sale in the united states? Your hint is that dolly the sheep died a long time ago, and that’s gross.
- Add a four letter word to the beginning of the following four words in order to create four entirely new words! Back, fish, hard, job.
- During the Cold War the US government in its infinite wisdom considered dropping enormous WHATs on the soviet union, each with the label ‘Medium?
- The literary review awarded which self-obsessed, hyper-judgemental and permanently sad, melancholy, depressed, PAIN IN THE ASS singer the Literary Review Bad Sex Award for the ‘egregious passage of sexual description’ in said singer’s debut novel, List of the Lost.
- It takes approximately what fraction of a second for a ninety-five mile an hour fastball to travel the sixty feet six inches from the mound to the plate, and yes, this is a round one question because you can just do the math if you’re so inclined.
- Scientists this past week revealed in a paper that they had trained what sort of animal to correctly identify benign or malignant tissue in mammograms?
- The phrase, “Do geese see god,” is an example of what?
- What common physical term comes from a root Latin word meaning “to throw out, shoot out, hurl, cast or dart?”
- Clark Kent is to Superman as Robert Zimmerman is to whom?
- The first ever WHAT was created in 1991 to watch the coffee pot in the Trojan Room, a break room in the computer lab at Cambridge University?
- The failure a company manufacturing miniature WHAT’S has prompted calls for stricter controls and vetting processes by the Kickstarter crowdfunding organization.
- A version of Mattel’s famous toy, 1965s Slumber Party Barbie came with a book called ‘How to Lose Weight’ that featured which two word weight-loss tip?
- The second largest WHAT was discovered this past week at a mine in South Africa?
- Louis Reard, the inventor of the bikini, said that a two piece bathing suit could not be called a bikini unless it could be pulled through what piece of matrimonial accouterment?
2.2 SUPER SECRET BONUS ROUND
There's a theme linking all of these answers. Can you tell me what it is?
- What was the first film created entirely from computer-generated imagery?
- What is the more common name of the Beatles album entitled, “The Beatles?”
- This volatile, toothy boxer defeated Trevor Berbick in 1986 to become the youngest ever heavyweight boxing champion of the world.
- James Franco is starring in the currently filming adaptation of which recent Stephen King novel?
- What American non-profit organization was created in 1954 by Fred Myers, Helen Jones, Larry Andrews and Marcia Glaser to address animal-related cruelties and animal welfare problems on a national scale?
- WHAT IS...this weeks super secret bonus theme?
- After 40 years Carly Simon revealed this past week which man was the subject of her hit song “you’re so vain,” which famously features the line, ‘You’re so vain, you probably think this song is about you.” For three points, is You’re So Vain about Warren Beatty, Jack Nicholson or Mick Jagger, all of whom Simon knew…BIBlically?
- G-Mail was originally a service offered by which website?
- Richard Nixon delivered his famous line, “I am not a crook,” at a resort in which famous theme park?
- Due to lyrics that may have misled careless consumers, camera company Polaroid was forced to release a statement clarifying that “Shaking or waving can actually damage the image” following the release of this song in 2003.
- A 2002 paper from astronomers at Johns Hopkins University clarified that the light of 200,000 galaxies, taken together, colors the universe a shade of beige called WHAT?
- The city of Detroit presented which middle eastern dictator with the Key to the City in 1980, after he donated hundreds of thousands of dollars to a struggling church?
- This ex-Python, that is, Monty Python cast member, is the director of such films as Time Bandits, Brazil, and The Fischer King.
- Who is the only non-human to testify before Congress?
- What is the only word that rhymes with Orange, and for two bonus points, what color is a polar bear’s fur?
- No republican has been elected to the office of President of the United States since 1928 without what or what on their ticket?
Answers after the break.
HI! Does your wood chipper squeak and smell after those 'unusual' jobs? Try new Sportchfork's Lime Lubricant, now with Lemon-flavored Scentions! It cleans and lubricates your wood chipper blades while dissolving organic matter in those hard to reach areas, and leaves behind a pleasing summer scent.
So the next time your business partner betrays you for a bigger share of the ransom, don't fret: Get Sportchfork's!
Dramatic, yet soothing music
You've been together a long time.
You've grown close.
And formed a bond.
But life won't last forever.
Isn't it time you made sure they're cared for...after you're gone?
Parrot-focused life insurance policies designed to ensure the safety and comfort of your feathered loved one in case of the unforeseen.
McEdelmann's Psittacoppascerae. Do it for Mr. Crackers.
Do you yearn for that 'maybe it's beef, maybe it's rat, maybe it's both' cheeseburger flavor?
Do you miss Hydropolonoxicaine?
Then come on down to Funky Franky's. We've hosed down the ball pit and in honor of my cousin Chuck holding on to his inspector's job, every night is wing night for the rest of the month! How bad can a wing be, right?
Funky Franky's. We ain't a drug front, but you'll wonder. You'll wonder.
ANSWERTRON WILL NOW DISPENSE YOUR ANSWERS.
WRONG ANSWERS WILL RESULT IN SUMMARY DEPORTATION, REEDUCATION AND INGESTION.
ANSWERTRON IS HUNGRY.
- Democrat Bo Eaton drew the longer straw. That’s it, there’s no punchline. That’s the law in Mississippi. Possibly elsewhere, I couldn’t bring myself to look it up. If there’s a tie in the votes, the two candidates draw straws. In order to determine who leads there people. There’s no new voting, no debate, no gladiatorial deathmatch, even. They just draw straws. Yaaaaay, democracy.
- Soon, we will all be eating genetically-modified Salmon cakes for dinner.
- Blowback, blowhard, blowfish and BlowjxCENSOREDxxx
- Condoms. This is an actual thing that happened.
- Morrissey. Fuck Morrissey. I mean, I get it, we're all entitled to our opinion and a lot of people like Morrissey but, I mean, lots of people think Donald Trump is a viable candidate for the presidency. I mean, there are similarities. They're both insufferable narcissists. They have awful hair. Their events are generally packed to the rafters with the sort of people I wouldn't want to lock dental braces with. I don't know where I'm going with this. But bear in mind, they didn't call the sex scene in Morrissey's book 'bad.' They called it 'egregious.'
- Right around four tenths of a second.
- Pigeons! They view the tissue sample and then pick Good or Bad…they were as accurate in their assessments as humans.
- A palindrome
- Ejaculate, which we get from Eiculari.
- Bob Dylan
- Drones. The Zano drones were depicted in ads as automatically following users, photographing them, surveilling, really everything but bringing their owners to orgasm, and then the machines that were delivered to early backers were basically paperweights with exposed propellers.
- Don’t Eat. A lot of people last night put 'eat less,' which I thought was cute. This was nineteen sixty five. I don't think they even let women vote until we landed on the moon. It's in the constitution somewhere.
- Diamond. Big ol' sucker, like 1100 carrots. Carrots. Cravats? Karats. Carpaccio.
- Louis Reard said that a bikini wasn’t a bikini unless it could be pulled through a wedding ring. God Bless Louis Reard. Also, you gotta love the French, you know? Not just a ring, a wedding ring. Take a breath and imagine with me a French man pulling off his wedding ring in a shop and pulling a bikini through the middle, then having it gift wrapped and sent to his mistress ahead of a weekend on the Mediterranean. I bet that never happened, ever. Monogamy is important you guys.
- Toy Story (11/22/95)
- The White Album (11/22/68)
- Mike Tyson(11/22/86)
- 11/22/63 (uh. I don't know when that was released, actually. But like, you get it, right?)
- The Humane Society (11/22/54)
- . 11/22! Woot! Man the college kids were pissed about that one. Love it. They get so mad and their little faces scrunch up and they spin in circles and, well, then they usually pee on the floor and I have to–wait, that's pugs. Sorry. My bad. I'm thinking of pugs.
- Man, what a useless breed of dog. Good thing they're so cute. Too bad they only live for two weeks or so.
- Warren Beatty, who claims to have had sex with more than ten thousand women in his life. But, I mean, who believes him?
- Garfield.com. Oddly enough Garfield believes Warren Beatty's claim. There's even a strip where he says so. Just pulls his face out of a pan of lasagna and says, 'Warren Beatty has had sex with more than ten thousand women.' Well, he thinks it.
- Disney World. How the hell did Jon know what Garfield was thinking?
- Hey Ya, by OutKast, because apparently you should not shake a polaroid picture like a polaroid picture. You should be sure to only shake your ass like a polaroid picture. Is Jim Davis still making Garfield?
- Cosmic Latte. Maybe that's gonna be the end of Garfield, some weird existential admission about Jon. Like, in this universe Garfield is a telepathic, intelligent cat, but there's some cinematic universe horse shit going on with the Shut Up Garfield universe, where he's just a normal cat, and then the Garfield Minus Garfield universe, where he doesn't exist at all, and there's like some cataclysmic war and then Jim Davis pulls a Dark Tower and Stephen King's himself into the strip as god and the whole thing just Sopranos to black at the end, but wait, did anybody else notice the pun just now? Cataclysmic? Cause it's Garfield. Cataclysmic.
- Saddam Hussein was given the Key to Detroit in 1980. He then converted the key into chemical weapons and the rest is literally history.
- Terry Gilliam. I told some kids on a date last night that Brazil was a romantic comedy about a young couple falling in love in Rio. IF I DON'T GET LAID NOBODY GETS LAID!
- Elmo. No, really, Elmo Monster was officially called to testify before Congress in 2002 to support funding for music education. Things went well until he started accusing them of being puppets of corporate America. I actually had the clip of him saying 'And Elmo KNOWS what it's like to have a HAND up your ass, CONGRESS!' as my ringtone for a while, but my dog made me change it.
- .Sporange, the singular of Sporangium, or Spore Case. Polar Bear Fur is transparent.
- A member of the Bush family, or Richard Milhouse Nixon. Hoover Curtis won a republican white house in 1928. Then in 34 we got FDR, and the next GOP WH was Eisenhower/Nixon in 52/56. Then we had Nixon/agnew in 68 and Nixon/Ford in 72. That one didn’t end well. Key word by the way is elected, the Ford White House doesn’t count because Ford got in the oval office the same as he entered every other room, by accident. Then we had Regan/Bush in 80/84, then Bush/Quayle in 88, and then Bush/Cheney, and that’s it: You have to go back to 28 to find a GOP white house that was not elected with a Bush or Nixon on the ticket.
And that, my friends, is that. We'll be back next week with another thrilling edition of Trivia With Ben, Live! At the Schullkill County State Penitentiary!
Play me out, Jobs! And release the hounds!
barkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkGRRRRR*the sound of a German Shepard eating a small audience member*barkbarkbark
WILLL ALL WAYS LOOOOVE YOOOOOOOU